My Dear Hubby,
This weekend marks three years of marriage and 5.5 years of dating and that feels so surreal. Remember back when we were two college kids, making milkshakes at a Young Life camp and dreaming about what life would hold after graduation?
When we first started dating back in the fall of my junior year, I remember feeling so lucky to be with you. You were handsome, funny, intentional, and you pursued my heart so well. I was giddy over every text, phone call, and Skype date, and checked the campus post office every day to see if you’d sent another letter or sweet and silly care package.
Those early days were full of longing – longing to know you better, longing to be where you were, longing for the shared future we soon grew to believe lay ahead of us. Over those two years we were apart, we both came to realize a truth we’d eventually share with our friends and family on our wedding day: no matter where we lived, no matter what we did, no matter what happened to us, as long as we were with each other, we were home.
When I moved to Kansas City after graduation and we finally got engaged and married, the focus of our relationship shifted. We went from longing to be together to actually being together and started the lifelong journey of learning to share a bathroom, bank accounts, responsibilities, and a life.
Photo: Kenzie Kate Photography
Those first few years had so many sweet moments, from our sushi date nights and sunset tennis matches to homemade meals and traveling adventures. We also had our fair share of challenging moments, of struggles with communication, expectations, and intimacy that ultimately led us into the office of a marriage counselor. We grew into our own skin and identity as one person in those first two years and even in all the ups and downs, we loved each other deeply and wholeheartedly through it.
Paris, France
When I think back on this last year of marriage, I see a new way that our focus has shifted. Our conversations and dreams have become less about us and more about the life we are building together. We’ve bought a home that we are slowly transforming into a place that will hold countless memories for us and for our children. We’ve adopted a sweet puppy whose kisses and playfulness bring us daily joy. And maybe most importantly, we’ve gotten to do something that’s transformed us both from the inside out: we’ve partnered with God to bring life into the world in the form of our sweet, handsome boy Caleb.
As our family grows, we’re seeing more and more the impact that our marriage has on this world. We have created a HUMAN, a person who will impact the world in ways we can’t even imagine. The things we do every day to love him and create a home for him have an eternal impact on him, on us, and on our world. The life we are building is beautiful and I love all the ways I’ve seen your servant’s heart this year.
You rubbed my aching hips and back during pregnancy and held my hand as I labored to bring our son into the world. You brought me water and chocolate banana milkshakes as I sat down to nurse our hungry boy once again. You stumbled out of bed when I finished nursing to rock Caleb to sleep when my arms are just too tired to hold him. You speak words of truth and encouragement when I’m discouraged, making me laugh and reminding me not to take myself too seriously as we learn how to be parents.
Even though the focus of this third year of marriage has been less about us and more about the life we’re building, my heart for you has grown so much deeper. I love our ordinary days, how we both choose slow and intentional over busy and “urgent,” knowing that the time we invest in each other and in our family is always more important than whatever activity or commitment we could be doing. Our marriage and our family are part of our eternal legacy and I love the mark that we are leaving on the world together.
You are an amazing husband, an amazing dad, and an amazing man. I couldn’t be more grateful for you, for our marriage, and for the life we are building together. Here’s to fifty more years and a whole lot more memories.
I love you more than the moon and the stars.
Your wife
Happy anniversary! I guess our anniversaries are just a week apart! How fun! I love this, Lauren! I relate so much to this. The longing during long distance to learning how to “adult” together to the ups and downs of the first year. Your words are so beautiful and wise. Hope you both have a great day together! (:
Thanks, Annie! 🙂 I’ve loved hearing your heart and your story with marriage this past year. You guys are fighting for your marriage and intimacy in beautiful ways!
Love all of these pictures! It’s been so fun to walk the journey of marriage at the same time as y’all. You’re such a wonderful couple. Congrats to you all- Caleb is lucky to have such wonderful parents 🙂
Thanks, Kelsie 🙂 I agree! I’m excited for what lies ahead for you guys!
Happy Anniversary! What a sweet tribute to your marriage. Cheers to many more…(in my opinion it just gets better and better).
Catherine Short recently posted…Weekend Links / / Bring On The Nesting
Thanks, Catherine! Same to you!
This is so sweet and I love that you share your heart on this blog. So touching, and you guys have such a wonderful life together and I admire the way that you work through all problems sensibly and with love. Love all of your photos as well 🙂
Hannah recently posted…5 Ways To Personalize Your Short-Term Living Space
Well thanks, Hannah! I appreciate that 🙂
So sweet! Happy three years!
Amberly recently posted…Are Your Spouse’s Endeavors a Priority for You Too?
Thanks, Amberly! 🙂
Such a sweet post. Happy Anniversary!
Greta | http://www.gretahollar.com
Happy anniversary, you two! Lauren, this post was so sweet, I teared up. It was amazing seeing your relationship grow throughout the years via just one blog post. Trevor and I started dating our junior year of college as well, and the distance was so hard on me. The skype calls and texts are what made my day. I’m so glad that we are no longer doing long distance, and I can’t wait to join the “Married” club!! 🙂
Chelsea recently posted…My Thoughts & Fears About Motherhood
Thanks, Chelsea! 🙂 You are always so encouraging! Long distance is no fun, even though it does challenge and grow your relationship in lots of ways. I am so excited for y’all to be married! And I just can’t wait to see all your gorgeous wedding pictures 😉
Happy anniversary! Jordan does sound like a wonderful husband, dad, and man. I went back and read about how you guys started dating and loved that post! I never realized you guys were long distance starting out! I liked the line in your post about you the beginning of your relationship when you said you left KC to go back to college, it didn’t feel like home anymore since you weren’t with Jordan. Jon and I were long distance during our first year also, and I felt the same way. Home was with him. Despite our many break ups, I’ve always felt like I was at home with him, even when we weren’t dating. It was one of the reasons I thought he was “the one” when we met and why I think I never stopped seeing a future with him. There is also really nothing like marriage after a baby. Although I think marriages can face some hardships after a child, I also think having such a wonderful man makes it SO much easier to parent and to face your new life. I would be lost without Jon. He was important to my life before, but now that we have a baby together, he is on a whole new level that I didn’t even know existed. He’s not just my husband anymore, but he’s my baby’s father. As always, I love your posts and your honesty! I love going back and reading your older posts that you wrote before I started reading. You are a fantastic writer and like I said to your comment on my blog, I love how easy it is to relate to you because you are so open.
Liz recently posted…Weekend Recap! Wedding Showers & Coffee Time
Isn’t long distance such a tough thing? We learned and grew so much in that year and a half but I would definitely never repeat it. And YES, I have loved seeing Jordan become a dad! I can’t imagine how I would raise our little guy on his own. I think I would have completely fallen apart on multiple occasions if Jordan weren’t here! And thanks for your sweet words, Liz 🙂 I’m so glad we get to share this journey of being a mama/blogger together!
Awe. This is so sweet. You have such a beautiful family, and the fact that you appreciate it, makes it even more beautiful. I’ve loved following your journey, and can’t wait to see where you all go next. Happy anniversary!
Thanks, Shann! You are so sweet 🙂
Oh, Lauren, this is sooo beautiful! Happy Anniversary to you guys! I hope you have a great day!! I always get so excited when I see a new post from you is up, because I love reading about your life. Thank you for writing the post about intimacy, because I had never read another blogger acknowledge that aspect of newlywed life being a struggle, and I agreed with it wholeheartedly. In a little over a month my hubby and I will be celebrating our first anniversary together. I cannot believe that it has already been a year! It has really gone by so fast. We have had struggles, and triumphs–but it has all been worth it. This post reminded me of how difficult it was to be in love, and be long-distance. My hubs was in Maui every summer, and I was in Nebraska–and boy am I glad we were able to video chat, but it was still such a struggle. I am glad the dating days are o’er, because married life is so much better!
Bethany Lotulelei recently posted…We Tilled Our First Garden (and almost wiped out our neighbor’s fence in the process)
Oh my heavens how sweet are you? From the very beginning I’ve felt like intimacy is something that just isn’t talked about and I was always so encouraged when I read or heard stories of other people who struggled too. I’m glad that you’ve been able to relate and be encouraged by our story! Congrats on making it a year…it is challenging and beautiful and the best thing in the whole world. 🙂
Happy anniversary!!! You’re an amazing couple, hope for many more years for you two!
liz @ j for joiner
Thanks, Liz! 🙂
Happy anniversary! This letter to your hubby was so sweet. I am about to join the married club this fall and I can’t wait. I know there are going to be ups and downs but I am ready for them all. Thank you for always sharing your heart with your readers 🙂
xoxo, Jenny
Aww this made me tear up… Such a beautiful story. This is such a great encouragement to me of how faithful our God is in causing all things to work together for our good and for His glory. Thank you for sharing Lauren 🙂 Blessings to you and your beautiful family!
Steph recently posted…take it to the Lord in prayer
Happy Anniversary! You guys seem super sweet together. Congrats on your growing family and the way you put it into words is lovely.
Angie Scheie recently posted…How Neiman Marcus’ Ken Downing Broke The Runway In Seattle
<3<3<3 You guys are so sweet! Happy anniversary!
Susannah recently posted…Playing It Up at the Olympia Children’s Museum